Excuse me, but I hope you aren’t coming here today looking for anything of consequence. I’m taking the day off. Frankly, the only reason I wrote what you are now reading is that I wanted to get paid for it in spite of not writing anything worth reading. And it’s not like I’m trying to rip off my boss either, as though I were taking a paid sick day even though I feel just fine.
No, I am absolutely not trying to pull something over on my boss. And even if I were, I do believe my boss would figure it out, don’t you?... seeing as how I’m admitting right here, up front, that I’m dumping a pile of inconsequential words into the blog pipe for no other reason than to get paid for them.
And listen, don’t go to thinking I couldn’t come up with something of consequence if I wanted to. There’s plenty to write about. Plen-ee. Justin Beiber, for instance. He got arrested, you know. I don’t know exactly what he got arrested for because I didn’t bother to read the whole news item because... well, basically, because I don’t give a crap what happens to Justin Beiber.
But if I’d awanted to, I coulda. I write about a lot of stuff I don’t give a crap about.
Or how about Chris Christie. He’s going to be arrested, I’d bet today’s pay check on it. It’s just a matter of time. And don’t tell me I couldn’t write a whole lot about Chris Christie and what he’s been up to over there in New Jersey. Hell, I could write Chris Christie’s weight in words about Chris Christie if I wanted.
But I don’t wanna. Not today. Counting my weekly column, I’ve been knocking out a thousand words, give or take, every 2.33 days ever since I opened this blog operation. Didn’t miss a beat for Thanksgiving... Xmas... New Yeras... my wife’s birthday... nuthin. And I’m taking a break, dammit. I deserve it. Chris Christie can wait.
And so can that weird-ass Martian rock that just seemed to appear out of nowhere. Know the one I’m talking about? The one those NASA fellas claim looks like a jellied donut?
Well, what if I were to tell you I think I know what it is, who put it there and how much it will alter the course of human history when the truth gets out? What do you think of that, huh?
But not today. That Martian rock may well be the biggest, most consequential thing that’s happened in my lifetime, and yours, too. But there ain’t nuttin gonna get me to put some consequence on this blog spot. Not today.
And don’t ask me what I thought about the Grammys last night. I didn’t think anything about the Grammys last night because I didn’t watch the goddam Grammy’s last night, just like I haven’t watched the goddam Grammys for years. And years and years. Ever since all the good kinds of music were murdered and replaced with whatever you call that swill you’re listening to now.
If you asked me, it started back in the 80s, back when Reagan and his gang were sucking the soul out of America and leaving nothing healthy behind but empty hype and unbridled greed. Seriously, doesn’t it make sense that honest musical creativity went down the same crapper along with unions, fairness, decency, U.S. presitige, and any hope of ever again hearing any semblance of the truth from Republicans? In fact, I have a theory about why those dopes think Reagan...
...hey wait a minute. Yer not gonna get me startd on that. Not that , and not today.
Now on what that idiot Mike Huckleberry... Hucksterly... Huckabuck... whatever... (I’ll be damned if I even take the time to get that idiot’s name right)... what he said about women. Jesus, why would anyone take a creepy little weasel like him seriously on anything, let alone women. Not that I’m goina say any more about that.
Or President Obama’s big speech tonight. The State of the Union. I’m sure e’ll do fine. He always does. I have this friedn—Sergeant Steve I call him—who keeps needling ne about how Obama is the worst president since Jimmy Carter and how Obamacare is flopping, even though eveybody that doesn’t have theur noses buried in Fox News’ butt knows that every month, the news on Obamacare just gets better and beter, and that Ronald Reagan couldn’t shine Jimmy Carter’s shoes, not to mention what a bucket of flop sweat George Busw is, was, and forever will be, and some day, I;; get aroun to telling Sargaent Steve all that not today though beause I’m in a hurry to get this damb thing done so I can go do somethung that isn’t doing this .
And whar;s the pint in talking about the Satate of te Union anywaay since it isn’t been sadi yet, anyways? And Obam’ll do fibe anyways. So I’m done now fir today and in thre minites, I’m gonna be off doing somthig else. I’m not even goig to reread it to see if there anu chagnes should make anf I’m not even gonna hit the spel check beofre I dump this off on my bos. A
Julia Davis Park looked pretty green on Sunday, Sept. 25, during a festival held to educate folks about marijuana. Hundreds turned out for Idaho H.O.P.E. Fest (Hemp Offers People Everything), Boise's first hemp festival. It featured live bands, DJs, guest speakers and educational exhibitions.
"The purpose is to educate people that hemp does offer people everything," said Sarah Caldwell, event coordinator. "The turnout is better than I expected."
Riots, terrorism, war, economic ruin, a beach house without Internet access.
One of these things is not like the others. That's because it is from the website whitewhine.com, a collection of complaints from people who could use some perspective.
Contentious, long-time Boise Weekly opinion columnist Ted Rall is in Afghanistan.
Readers who regularly follow Rall already know that he raised almost $26,000 through Kickstarter to fund his trip as an unembedded reporter. He, cartoonist Matt Bors (who has not left the country in his adult life) and cartoonist Steven Cloud left for Central Asia the first of the month and recently entered Afghanistan.
In addition to filing his regular week columns while he's in Afghanistan, Rall is also attempting a daily cartoon blog. Thus far, he's filed 14 cartoons from his Afghan Notebook, a task that requires him to upload his work via satellite phone at a painfully slow rate.
One recent entry from the Afghan Notebook series details the ups and downs in a recent day of travel. Up: roads in the Kunduz province that were not paved during Rall's first trip to Afghanistan in 2001 are paved now, shortening a three-day trip into just several hours. Down: overnight accommodations are difficult to come by without a steep price or the threat of a night Taliban raid.
BW readers will still find Rall's weekly columns in our pages, however, to keep up with his Afghan Notebook, readers will have to visit Rall's personal blog. It's perhaps the most alternative perspective you'll find coming out of Afghanistan now, and a highly recommended addition to your blog reader.
Boise State undergrad student Andrew Nies is not a football fanatic. But when it comes to the Broncos, he makes an exception with a twist. In order to more fully appreciate the sport, he wondered if there was a way to watch a game from a scientific perspective. There is. Late last fall, the geophysics major buried broadband seismometers around Boise State’s campus just before a home game. On a chilly November day when the Broncos soundly defeated their age-old rival the University of Idaho Vandals, Nies’ gear recorded the underground waves or vibrations made by the crowd.
Turns out the Bronco faithful are enthusiastic early in the first half of the game. All that cheering, stomping and screaming tapers off as the first half comes to a close. That’s one of many findings Nies discovered. He presented his research at a gathering of some 500 seismologists at the Seismological Society of America conference. It’s happening this week in Portland, Or.
The largest spike in activity happened in the final minutes of the first half of the game when the Broncos scored a last minute kick off and Bronco touchdown. “So we see the crowd isn’t responding as much. Then there’s this build up” said Nies, “Then bam! You have this big event.”
In the geophysical world, these “big events” actually aren’t so big. They’re micro earthquakes. Seismologists usually study these tiny tremors in volcanoes. A tiny vibration almost too small to record happens when something like a rock breaks off inside a volcano. That’s what Nies really wants to study.
“We don’t have any volcanoes here [Boise],” Nies explained, “ So I wondered what we could go out and monitor.” This was last fall about the time when the Oregon Ducks were coming to town to take on the Broncos. Nies and geophysics assistant professor, Matthew Haney, were talking about the big matchup when it struck them both. Why not record the crowd’s response using seismometers?
It didn’t happen for that game between the Broncos and the Oregon Ducks. There’s permits involved. Two foot holes to be dug for the equipment. The gear then must be buried. Volunteers are needed to jot down notes of major events, say when the cannon fires after a touchdown or the marching band performs. By the time the classic rival matchup with the Vandals rolled around, Neis and a team of 20 volunteers was ready.
The seismometers recorded kickoffs and touchdowns and also some anomalies that took Nies by surprise. “We actually figured out we recorded a magnitude 6.1 earthquake in Argentina,” he said. There was also a “little blip” in the data. Turns out it was the Vandal’s marching band as they headed toward the stadium right before the game. “We didn’t expect that or the earthquake. It was really cool to see it in the record.”
Nies isn’t the first to record the seismic activities during a football game. The University of Wisconsin and Louisiana State University have already done some similar research.
Nies still has data to analyze. He and Haney plan to submit a paper to an academic journal once their analysis is finished. They also are eyeing the Bronco’s upcoming season where the two plan to do more tests using different equipment that sense ground displacement.
In the meantime, Nies may get his wish to study micro earthquakes in volcanoes. He’s hoping to go to Iceland this summer with Haney to put seismometers in a volcano near Eyjafjallajokull. That’s the volcano that erupted earlier this month. Those plans may be put on hold. Scientists say another larger volcano usually erupts when Eyjafjallajokull does. “If that happens we might change our plans a little bit.” Nies chuckled adding, “I don’t have a say in the matter.”
Bingo's Blingo has been consolidated into Cobweb, our Boise Weekly group blog.
So if you are a fan of the Blingo and looking for new blog posts or archives, don't panic. Bingo will continue to contribute, however infrequently, to the Cobweb.