“They got tortured but never stop going, they got stubbed but they endure, they always think life is too long while others say are too short”
FBM Fidel in Route to Peace

There is so much we can learn from trial and tribulation, but the one thing that it makes us is strong. When we achieve success through trial, we hardly fall apart again. Brilliant young men don’t just happen, they emerge from hardship and challenges. Before I had time to enjoy my childhood, war forced me into places that were not pleasant. At first, I could not understand, but today I realize that those unpleasant places have taught me so much that I would not trade for anything.

I noticed that when kids start going astray in wealthy families, they are sent to some kind of boot camp where they are put through the trials and challenges of life to try and make them appreciate how well they've got it. Looking close at the program, you’ll realize that these rich kids are made to live regular folks' kind of life to make them change. This makes me appreciate emerging from trial to success.

Living as a refugee, I had to stir hope and keep it burning. My belief was to the roof that there is that day, that day when life will react in my favor, and that’s just how refugees and other regular folks with dreams in life think and believe. And I am a witness and beneficiary to this success that comes from hope and belief. As evidence: “I am here, ain’t I?”

There may be many bad things in life, but being a refugee is one of the top 10 worst situations a human being can be in. It comes with a lot of losses. Unlike others situations, it even gets worse. You run away from your home suddenly leaving everything you own behind, everyone you know and everyone that can help you and make you feel valuable. As in my case and many others who fit in my shoes, you leave your parents, siblings and everyone else that you know. You go to a far away land and are placed in a camp where they feed you, dress you and clean after you like a pet. You get isolated from the outside world, with no hope of when or how that situation will end.

But there is no one that hopes higher than refugees. No mater how many atrocities they go through, how much they've lost, orphans or widows, they keep that hope high that there is a day. There is a day when their moment will arrive. Life is about moments, and when it arrives, it's arrived. Even all the nation may raise against it, it will still happen. That’s the moment all refugees hope for and believe in. This belief and hope keep them enduring when statistics show they have 99 percent risk of poverty. Will there be a day when there will be peace on every corner of the world? I don't know, but i know there will be a day when the word "refugee" won't mean suffering no more.

“I asked is the world ending tomorrow. They answered to me “no”
I asked again, next week, next month or next year?
They answered with no doubt “no“
then I look at them and tell them, "Why then kill myself while I still got enough time to try?"
FBM Fidel in Route to Peace

When I arrived in Boise in 2006, I was welcomed by lovely people. Not lying. I wondered for some days, not knowing how to make friends or where to start, but what I did not know was once in Boise, there are no tricks about making friends. People are already friendly.

I would see people I’ve never seen talking to me and showing interest in listening to me, At first I thought it's because I am different; that was not it. People in Boise are just just friendly people. They show the same interest to every person, and that's when I fell in love with this small city. Since then I have managed to build relationships that I am proud of with many elementary and high schools here and with different agencies. They have taught me so much about the American society and in return I have offered them much of the rest of the world's ways of life ... mostly the African ways and the refugee situation around the world.

Being in America for the past four years is a privilege to me and has given me the opportunity to look at my world from a good eye. Things that are going on in many countries in Africa felt normal to me when I was there, but arriving here and looking back, I realize that so much of them shouldn't be going on. I realize that people are unaware of what is expected of them. Likewise, here in America, there are so many things that I have seen that I compare to what we have in our country and say, "Americans need to know this." That's why I love raising awareness in this country.

First I want to say thanks to the American society and especially to the people of Boise to have supported me, my writing and my family in Uganda through Boisetobukavu.com and by purchasing my Route to Peace book that keeps my younger siblings in school. I know you have all been waiting for this day, the day I will go and reunite with the rest of my family.

It has arrived. This June I am leaving for a six week family reunion in Kampala. My older sister who has recently lost her husband will join the family as well for the first time since 1992, with her five kids from Kisangani. Two other sisters also will join in from Bukavu, hopefully with their kids, and since Boise has been a huge part of the lives of the 11 family members that reside in Kampala and me here, I have the privilege of keeping you in touch through Boise Weekly on this blog.

I am leaving on the 10th of June, so if anyone has a question or things they would love to know, wants me to speak to their groups or school before I go, just let me know.

For those in Boise who love soccer, I will also report the FIFA WORLD CUP here, as it will be going on in South Africa. Watch out for the next article to know how you can also watch the World Cup in Boise.

I been participating in sharing my experience in Boise for about four years now and three of those have been with the Save Darfur Coalition group.

Save Darfur Coalition is another group that has been working solely to raise awareness of the situation in Darfur, Sudan. I have been attending their meetings for the past three years now and it’s amazing how fast the numbers have been adding up.

On Saturday, April 3, Save Darfur is hosting a meeting at the Ann Frank Memorial. There will be a march from the Capitol to the Memorial starting at 11 a.m. The meeting at the Memorial begins at about 11:45 a.m.

A number of Darfur survivors will speak, share their experiences on what it means to be from Darfur. There will also be traditional drumming and dancing as usual and I will share some of my unpublished poetry in the end.

You are all we invited to join and help raised awareness on Darfur ahead of the Sudanese elections coming this April 24. There are some worries among Sudanese people that the elections might not be fair and so the Save Darfur Coalition has been signing a petition to urge President Obama not to support these elections.

It's a shame to see how a country once so rich, can fall to its misery in just a year,

Like in Germany, “before the war, we used to take money in the pocket and come home with a wheelbarrow of goods, but after the war we carry money in the wheelbarrow and come back with goods in pockets.”

When I first arrived in Zimbabwe in 1999, I had no other country to envy. They called her Half London, She was a beauty and so clean that Europeans migrated there.

Life was great and people were hunky-dory with every factor. Like in America, people get in illegally hoping to chase the Zimbabwean dream.

I lived there as a refugee. But a refugee life back then was better than one in the west.
This was the best refugee camp in Africa ... I would say of the world, but I haven’t been to the rest of the camps in the world. But seriously, this camp was off the chain, while people in Zambia were struggling, building their own houses out of mud, and in Botswana burning in tents.

We were living like rock stars in Zimbabwe with hot water, bath tubs and electricity.

Houses in the camp were 10 times better than most apartments in the city. This is Tongogara Refugee Camp. With 300 refugees back then, they would pay us for learning English, give us projects and sponsorships to good colleges and high schools out of the camp. I am telling you, back then no refugee wanted to leave this place for anywhere.

It wasn’t too long before this Cadillac treatment started catching up to us. The Zimbabwean citizens started feeling jealous of the way we were living and President Mugabe's idea of land reform coming to fruition would change the image of this paradise forever.

In early 2000, a flood hit Mozambique, Zimbabwe and a bit of Botswana. The refugee camp was also demolished by this catastrophe and we had to go to Harare for refuge. The way to Harare was a challenge as we had to walk our way out with Zimbabweans insulting and refusing to help us. This same time the land reform plan of Mugabe was getting popular and farms were being confiscated from the British and given to their comrade Zimbabweans. The land reform got so violent and people started getting hurt, therefore the British decided to abscond the country and flew to England.

We the refugees were later forced to return to rebuild our devastated camp, Some of us who didn’t want to return were deported to their countries. I was among the ones to be deported, but escaped to Botswana in 2002 after my friends were captured and imprisoned for about a year.

This was the beginning of the end of the land once called "Half London" by many Europeans. Not the deportation of refugees, not the flood, but the president's land reform idea. Making the British angry would create a conflict between Mugabe and the West.

I returned in Zimbabwe in 2004 and what a welcoming atmosphere I arrived into! Prison, foreigners were being arrested and beaten. But this is not what caught my attention ... I was stunned by the condition of the city.

It was a rainy night; the first thing I noticed was how dark the city looked. All the street lights were vandalized and when I asked what happened, I got an answer I wasn’t prepared for.

"People were so broke that they started going after the aluminum that was in those light poles," people told me. The roads were all bumpy and muddy with dips every where caused by people ... the city looked like a bush, with long grass everywhere in the street with no one caring.

The next morning I noticed a long line of people waiting for bread by the supermarket. Should I have waited for bread there, I was going to have breakfast at 4pm. What happened to this country just in two years of my absence?

Transportation was a huge problem not because people would not afford gas but because gas could not afford people. People would buy two cars just so they could get gas for the other one. One will be staying by the gas station, waiting for a refill to fill the one that is running, because gas was available once a month just like corn meal and cooking oil.

People had to sleep weeks by the store waiting to buy cooking oil. And when it came they could only sell one per person. What’s happening in this country? It sure looks like Germany after World War Two here …

The worse part was how the currency was loosing value; they were printing new money like America with new electronics. Every month there is a new bill and the old one is valueless. In a few years every thing was priced in US dollars and Rand and that was the end of Zimbabwe's local currency.

People started starving, crime increased and infrastructure was demolished while the West watched, waiting for that perfect moment to tell the people “ You see how bad your president has made you suffer?” The people would hate the president but is it really the president that makes the people suffer?

He is a dictator, yes we agree, but can someone come get him off? It’s actually the embargoes and sanctions that caused these struggles and even though we say it’s the president who is bad, the people are the ones affected by the consequences of his actions. It’s about time sanctions and embargoes are stopped from being the solutions to solving international crises. Because this causes more death and suffering to the people they should be protecting in the first place. Mugabe never struggles where to buy his cooking oil or gas, and by the fact that he is a dictator, he could only care less if the people are struggling to find food.

The refugee camp today is deteriorated with more than 3,000 refugees living in tents and struggling to know what the future holds for them. Most of them have problems of insecurity and seek protection from the United Nations. It's a shock to see a country once adored by the world being spoken evil of in just less than a decade.

What caused this? Is it the dictatorship of Mugabe or the sanctions and embargoes layed on the country?

I blame both, but strongly condemn the sanctions ...

With every refugee around the world dreaming of resettlement as the best durable solution over repatriation and integration, there are lot more challenges than we as refugees are unaware of.

Growing up in our Third World countries, we learn about the developed world. But the main thing we get is these countries are rich and everyone that gets there will automatically do well.

With wars swiping us out of our countries and leaving us in worse conditions than back home, these dreams of moving or being resettled abroad rise higher than ever. Refugees would do whatever we can to get out of the UN camps where we temporarily wait for peace in our respective nations.

Like I wrote in my poem: “It’s hard to know the evil a good eye sees, if you are a blind eye. All you want is a good eye.” Coming to the US has made me think so much and ask myself, had most of these people known all these things that they are trying to understand now, would they have wanted to come to these countries?

Some people may look at me and say, 'But Fidel! You’ve always talked about what a blessing it has been for you coming to the US.' I know, it’s has been a blessing for me and I am killing to have some of my family come and share it with me. But is it the same for others?

I’ve been paying close attention to how refugees have been developing wherever they were sent, mostly in Europe and America, and a good number in Australia, and I will tell you that many of them are still lost and find it hard to find their path. Despite those thousands of cases of family destruction, being married to the law or struggling trying to know what to do, I have been having it tough to understand this one dilemma this particular refugee faced just in her first year in the US.

A woman from Burundi landed in Idaho with five children. She was pregnant, could not speak a word of English, Swahili, French or any other international language; all she could speak was Kirundi. Living in a refugee camp for years, she knew nothing about new technology and coming to Idaho was like her birthday into the new world, new language, new civilization and new everything.

By new everything I mean almost everything she would see or hear was new for her. Like I mentioned earlier, people may question me for saying I am blessed being here, unlike this woman. When I moved here I had already known 90 percent of what America would be like, I spoke 10 languages already including English, I had lived in more than six countries and grew up in a city with technology and laws nearly like America's (South Africa).

This woman has seen the worst in the US, things that no refugee should ever see in her first year. After giving birth to her sixth child, her volunteer sponsors built a social case against her that resulted in her losing her children to the state. She was a loving mother, never abused her kids in any way, but the cultural differences to which she was still trying to adapt fell into play, and the people that volunteered to help her turned against her and built a case against her. She lost all six of her children seven months ago now and was treated so unfairly because of the emotions of love that she showed, crying and throwing herself to the ground, making Americans, who could not understand the value of a child to an African, say she was mentally ill.

My concern here is: When we are brought to these countries, we come oblivious to everything and we need a bit of time to adjust, learn and change some things to meet these country's laws. Having the book thrown at you in your first year is not something anyone would like to see, especially in a case like the above.

I would not question having a refugee thrown in the hands of the law for things like DUI, murder, abuses of any sort of illegal things. With common sense, every human being would know that killing, stealing driving under the influence and many more things are wrong. But social cases contain a lot of cultural differences that this woman was supposed to be oriented on. In her first year looking for a job, learning English and trying to learn how to use a vacuum cleaner, these volunteers could have taught her how to do things to the American standard rather than throwing her in the hands of the law. What effect does that have on refugees trusting volunteers? I have seen other refugees deny volunteers from entering their houses with fears that they would do such a thing to them too.

This case has more details to it but they can not be talked about due to the children being involved. Many refugees would love to hear people step up to try and help her get her family back. But as refugees in these new countries, people fear their status and can not speak up. She needs lawyers, advisers and all others that think they can help in any way as her kids are her life. She finds life useless without them and I know every woman, weather African, American, European or Australian would share these painful feelings with her.

Ghana controlled the entire game but was unlucky to hit the net as most of their chances were either being forced out by the Egyptian keeper or go wide but for Egypt, it was a day to celebrate again as African Champions.

We will continue looking toward the World Cup now as the count down starts. And the premier league, Series A and La Liga continue giving us displays to watch coming June11.

Adebayor made his first start in Manchester City today since the Togo bus attack in Angola, with a bang as he scored the opening goal in the city's 2-0 win over Portmouth. Arsenal disappointed in the Emerat today losing 3-0 to Man United.

Let's crown Egypt and watch our six African World Cup reps as they are preparing for the World Cup.

After watching the tournament favorite Ivory Coast knocked out by Algeria last night with a 3-2 loss in extra-time and Angola the host eliminated by Ghana with a 1-0 score. The only nation that would stop Egypt to take this trophy three times in a row was going to be Cameroon.

Cameroon started the game so well today, dominating in all departments and taking the lead in the 26th minute through Emana's shot that was deflected into the net by an Egyptian defender.
But despite the dominance, still fans doubted if the Lions will hold on to that lead past half time.

Close to the end of the first half, the fans' doubt proved to be real, as a 34 meter shot beat the Cameroon keeper, who would have done better. Egypt managed to push the game into the second half with a 1-1 score.

In the second half, Egypt came with fire, and Zidan would have scored three times in the first three minutes when Cameroon was playing sloppy, letting him loose in the box chasing a long ball from his keeper, but his check went wide. Shortly after those chances, Cameroon regrouped and took control of the game again forcing the Egyptian goal keeper into a number of tough saves throughout the second half. Eto'o had too great chance from about 20 meters out, while Emana's shot heroically saved the the number on skipper.

Meteeb would have given Egypt a win in the 89th minute but he shot on the side netting allowing Cameroon another 30 minutes of extra time.

The extra time started with a bang as Egypt benefited from the Njitap's mistake to beat the keeper on a back pace to make it 2-1. Hassan mad it three with a free kick that the goal keeper bounced against the post and it bounced back crossing the line to put the game out of Cameroon's reach. It's was over for Eto'o and his Lions as the fans where ready to die from heart attack like the Milan fan who passed away last night during the derby.

Egypt keeps impressing and there is no doubt that this trophy for the third time running it'is going to be celebrated in the land of Pharaoh. The was no way Cameroon was going to get two goals in the extra-time after their hope was shut down by the red card in the last minutes after Egypt took advantage of a defensive mistake and the Cameroon defender could not manage to deal with it but to pull the striker down.

Egypt's progress to the semi-finals to join Ghana and Algeria. Nigeria is playing Zambia later today and the winner will join these three as the top four African teams. Only two of the five World Cup representatives have made it to the top four. Should Nigeria win later today they will save the faith of the disappointing Cameroon and Ivory Coast but, is there a team to prevent the Pharaoh from taking this trophy again?

W e can only wait and see. Sorry Diddier Drogba and Samuel Eto'o, Due to Egypt, you may end up finishing your careers without an African Cup trophy. Keep conquering Europe.

Didier Drogba and the Ivory Coast changed the gear in their last group game against champions Ghana
to become the first team to qualify to the quarter finals of the African Cup of Nations.

Ghana a team with a number of stars, and their Ivorian contenders showed up without Micheal Essien who was on the bench for the first 45, Muntari who was kicked out of the team for disciplinary reasons and Stephen Appiah who has missed the second tournament so far due to injury. And a team lead by Asamoah and other small but talented guns wanted to face a huge elephant led by the world best stars such as Diddier Drogba, Kolo and Yaya Toure, Silvinho and Kalou, and just looking at this Ivorian team, you could see burial for the Black Stars of Ghana.

Silvinho converted the first chance early in the first half and put the elephant ahead on a close range to win. But the game seemed to have been spoiled when Arsenal skipper Eboue was sent off for a two footed foul,the Ivorians kept their game in fourth gear, allowing Siaka Tiene and Drogba to be on target and put the game out of the Black Stars reach by 3-0.

In the stoppage time the Ghanaian consolation goal came through a spot kick to end the game 3-1, a score which was enough to clinch the Elephants spot in the quarter finals.

Now the Elephants are favorites to win the trophy and continue to flourish after this display. Only the Pharaohs have shown the signs of stopping them should they meet along the way.

The pharaohs start the defense of the tittle they won for two consecutive campaigns today by demolishing the Supper Eagles of Nigeria 3-1.

Nigeria took the lead in the 12th minute through Chinedu Obasi, hoping to win their third cup. But Egypt kept their composure, and thanks to strikes from Emad Meteab, Ahmed Hassan and Mohammed Naguy they would see the seventh honor coming their way as they now lead group C by three points, ahead of Benin and Mozambique, who could only settle for a 2-2 draw in the other fixture of the day.

Nigeria is another World Cup representative from Africa and so far none of the three World Cup reps has played up to the Worldly standards, and that just more worries for the African fan.

Cameroon and Ghana are the other two World Cup reps still to see and tomorrow the Indomitable Lion of Cameroon will build their World Cup and African Cup case as they take on Gabon, a team they snatched the World Cup sport from while Ghana missed out of the first encounter as their first opponent Togo boycotted the tournament. Now they have to wait until Friday to prove to the world that they can do it without Muntari and Appiah as they take on their fellow favorite Ivory Coast.

See you tomorrow as we see Eto'o and Camoroon taking the center stage.

Man! I am sad, hurt and disappointed in our Continent right now.

I've been trying my best to defend our hatred and cruelty for many years now thinking one day we will be able to come to our senses and bring peace and unity to our lovely Africa, but how long can I keep up hope?

You can do all you want, but when we start hurting the people that give us hope, it is really disturbing.

I am following the news unfolding about the Togolese soccer team bus, taking the players to Kabinda where they are opening up their first African Cup of Nations game, being attacked by gun men for 30 minutes. I was nothing but shocked.

How more evil can we get than that? When someone that should be appreciating the fact that his nation, toned by war for 27 years, finally is being honored to host an international sport event, gets up in the morning and say " Hey dude! Let's go and shoot these soccer players."

The bus was attacked for 30 minutes by gunmen, killing the bus driver, injuring two players and about 18 stuff members including two coaches. “They should not have traveled by road,” Gabriel Ameyi, vice-president of the Togolese Football Federation said. “They did not tell officials that they were traveling by road. They should have flown to Angola.” To hear the audio of the attack description by a victim click here.

Now, How bad can it get if you ask players that play safe football in Europe that they had to fly to the stadium to play because they will be shot at if they walk or drive? If they were shot at going to the city, they can be shot at while playing.

I too am concerned about the World Cup already, not because the same will happen but because the reputation of the whole African continent is spoiled. The world will try to connect this to the World Cup as we already started hearing from the Europeans. Even though South Africa is a safe place, from my experience living there for five years, I still feel like people that have never visited Africa before think of the whole Continent as a war front, which is not true. I just hope this doesn't change the mind of fans and players going to the World Cup this June.

I am really disappointed in the words of the vice-president of the Togolese Football Federation, that the players shouldn't have traveled by bus. So you blame them while you should be sympathizing with their families! At least the premier league clubs in England are showing some concern by calling all over Africa, trying to assure their million pounds football heroes are safe. In Europe, football associations are calling out Fifa to assure the safety of their players or they should return to Europe right away. Togo is thinking of boycotting the whole competition and returning home, as they can not wipe the memories of the attack in-time for the game game tomorrow.

"All the players just want to go home to their families after seeing bullets in their teammate's bodies," said Adebayor, who is the main star of the team. The tournament is still scheduled to kick off on Sunday, but there are still some concerns about what will happen if Togo decides to quit.

Among the the players in Angola are $30 million Emmanuel Adebayor who was in the bus, a player for Manchester City in England. Samuel Eto'o of Cameroon, who is one of the top three strikers in the world playing currently in Inter Milan Italy. Didier Drogba arguably the best striker in England, playing for Chelsea and more million dollars players that play all over Europe like, Ivory Coast's Yaya Toure, Kolo Toure, Ebouwe, Zakora, Arouna Dindane. For Mali, Kanoute, Kaite, Diarra in Spain and Mouhamed Sissoko in Italy. Cameroon Eto'o Flis, Rigobert Song, Alexandra Song. Nigeria Mwanko Kanu, Marin Yakubu and tens more from 16 African countries that are playing in Europe.

I am hurt and think if these culprits are found they should be thrown in a stadium full of football fans and watch how people feel about their act.