In other words, Bob, you take the college football part. All of it—lock, stock and jock straps. And the U of I takes the university part. This way, both schools can quit pretending they are proficient in roles at which they are clearly dismal flops.
There is this certitude among conservatives that being liberal is a phase children go through. Something like bed-wetting or being a Goth or going to college. They have convinced themselves that the process of maturing is supposed to take the liberalness out of a man, if he's any kind of man.