Taking away the porn angle, your significant other is doing something, he knows you don't approve of, and how disgusting it makes you feel when he wants to have sex after. Sounds like a disrespect thing to me. Especially if he is aware of your past issues with sex abuse. I would suggest talking to him and maybe coming up with a compromise that you can both agree to and feel good about. If he is unwilling to compromise, then you need to decide if you can live with the way it makes you feel, or lose him and find someone that wants to make you feel good about yourself!
I'm in a healthy monogamous relationship and we just hit the 3 year mark. My bf and I have sex fairly regularly, BUT he has and I have admittedly watched porn from time to time - maybe one of us is out of town or I can't climax during sex. Despite the "plethora of psychological research currently available," I have not adopted the mindset that porn is all bad. And I've never thought that porn is cheating.
That being said I certainly don't agree with this hasty piece of advice! As with most things, context needs to be considered. If you're uncomfortable with how porn is present in your relationship and he continues to press you, that is wrong! But it might not hurt to open your mind a little. Maybe explore what type of porn you could get into. If that's totally out of the question and this is something he can't get over, maybe it's time to move on!
You nailed it. He is a little too frenetic. I miss David. I also liked how he could have a serious convesation with people and didn't have to be "on" all the time.
Dear X, here are some facts on porn that are worth reading. And you feel like he's cheating on you because he is cheating on you.
I will never understand why is it porn? Is it because it deals with sex? People in general learn from and absorb the things they see and do everyday. Sex is hidden away
we don't have a healthy concept. If it was a romantic comedy we would call it a movie. One could argue that the lack of sex, sex editing, and classification into porn is the reason that people get addicted to it. It seems so taboo and exotic. Who does this sex conversion benefit? Not us! It benefits retailers and governments that can at anytime sensationalize sex and sexuality to either sell us clothes or keep us from noticing their politics agenga.
What horrible advice! There is a difference between occasionally looking at porn and a true porn addiction. A porn addiction negatively impacts your life and relationships. My ex's case was extreme. He would waste 6 hours of his Saturday masturbating to porn. It changed the way he acted and the way he treated me. It also led to sexual dysfunction (occasional erectile dysfunction and inability to climax). I had no problems with porn until I saw the effect and the hold it had on him. Some men seriously become more interested in porn than in the real thing, and I'm sorry--that is anything but normal and healthy.
Wow, I am surprised that such belief still exists after the plethora of psychological research currently available about the devastating effects of porn on individuals and relationships. PLEASE do not take to heart this uniformed advice. Yes, accept your partner fully for who he is, love him unconditionally, but you do not need to accept his unfaithful, harmful and potentially addictive behavior. Just because pornography is widespread does not mean it is harmless. Please talk to a therapist, an opinion column is not the best place to get sound help or advice for something like this. Best wishes to you.
Thank You! I hope you are right.
Overheard from a group of old men taking breakfast at a Nampa McD: 'Asking Trump about the Quds was just like what that dumb Bitch did to Sarah Palin.' Referring to couric I think. Just an unrelated example of good old Idahoan ignorance. Give them a break Cope, nuanced thought can be painful.
A short course in Vatican history can be had in the September 14, 2015 "New Yorker" magazine.
Some wonderful pointers on writing skills can be found in the September 14, 2015 "New Yorker" magazine.
Professor Rember, I wish I'd been a pupil of yours as I would have accepted the challenges I think.
BTW - Personal beliefs are personal. Not something to be imposed upon others.
Truth... er, life truly IS stranger than fiction
Well now Ed old boy, it seems to me that your poll says a whole lot more about the intelligence of a large segment of the USA population than it does about the Democratic party candidates.
Republicans, conservatives, Xtian end timers and other uneducated, illiterate, useful idiots are all just brown-shirts waiting for the instructions to start mass killing of everyone they hate or...End Times, though it would be best to get a chance to use the ole AR 15 first.
When the best the Dumbocrat party can counter with is a hypocritical and geriatric Socialist, an egregiously corrupt and bitter old lady who has failed at everything she's ever done and who is only around as a result of riding her philandering husband's coattails and, likely, a creepy old white guy who can barely manage to form a complete sentence, the Republican candidates look like a political all-star team by comparison. With these three idiots on the left, the jokes practically write themselves.....
Cope, you forced me to go to the online database to find out who Annie Wilkies was. I did see that movie. And "Think for Youself", we have disowned Kim.
The best part of the whole Kim Davis affair is that she's a registered DEMOCRAT !! Add her to the long and growing list of kooks on the left, which, by the way, is also infamous for spawning pretty much every person responsible for a mass shooting in the U.S. in recent history. The loony left draws these crazies like flies to honey where they are, unfortunately, a perfect fit....
Concerned......literally everything you wrote was fringe paranoid bullshit. Also, the civil war pretty nicely solved any supramacy questionss between the feds and the state. Thank you for refuting the old platitude that all children are capable of learning.
What does that say about the democratic candidates when everyone of them trails trump in a national poll.
If you are a person of faith, get ready to go to jail in the United States of America. I thought there was this thing in the constitution called the Bill of Rights that protected my unalienable right to exercise my religious beliefs. But now a single man in a black robe (Mr. Kennedy) has decided for all 300+ million Americans. The States have the rights regarding marriage as demonstrated by Kim working as an elected official of her state. But now the Federal government wants to take all power from the states and take our rights of free expression and religious beliefs. Wait until a Federal Marshal shows up at you home or office to haul you off to prison for not baking a cake for a gay couple's wedding, or taking photos, or saying "hate speech". It's already here as Kim and others can attest to.
THAT'S WHATS UP! FINALLY SOMEONE WHO HAS THE BALL'S TO TELL IT LIKE IT IS. PLANNED ON KEEPING MONTANA WHEN THE TIMES RIGHT....MUCH LOVE AND RESPECT
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