Comedy Central's Workaholics Doesn't Work 

Telemarketers high-fiving their way to the toilet

The suffix in "alcoholic" is "ic," not "oholic," so Comedy Central's new show, Workaholics, should have been called Workics. Regardless, there's no such thing as "workohol," just as there's no such thing as "shopohol" or "chocohol."

Very few comedies are good from the start--it often takes a season or two--but it's hard to imagine that Workaholics will get the chance to purge its deficiencies.

It's the kind of show in which fist-bumping drunks inflict gross pranks on each other and say things that rhyme, such as, "Send her a pic of your dick." The main characters are three dumb guys (played by Blake Anderson, Adam Devine and Anders Holm) who leave dollar bills wrapped around their own poop and wait for someone to pick it up.

Basically, they're the kind of guys most of us wish would just hurry up and go extinct.

Then you find out where they work, and it all makes sense. They're telemarketers--precisely the kind of people most of us want to see die. However, the telemarketing aspect of the show manages, albeit counterintuitively, to render the characters somewhat sympathetic. If your job requires making everyone who still has a landline hate you, there's really no reason why you shouldn't remain constantly stoned and fixated on your own waste.

Also, they're forced to take a drug test in the first episode, which makes them even more sympathetic. If anyone should be allowed to take drugs at work, it's people trying to sell staplers over the phone.

Despite the linguistically problematic title, the show does get one thing right--the pilot episode is called "Piss and Shit." If you enjoy the show and its scatological platitudes, there's a good chance that you'll become a shitaholic.

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