IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE 

It's not often DNA testing provides the big break in a bank robbery investigation. That sort of evidence analysis, it's reasonable to assume, is more suited to crimes of a pervy or murder-y variety, rather than the regular old "I'm an angry, desperate dude at the end of my rope and I gots to get me some frickin' money"-type of offenses.

A New York Yankees fan from the 3,000-person northern Idaho town of Sagle has provided an exception to that rule. Last week, a federal jury in Coeur d'Alene convicted Steven Howard, 37, of Sagle of robbing the Horizon Credit Union branch in Coeur d'Alene in December of 2003. According to the U.S. Attorney's Office, the suspect in the crime wore a white Yankees cap pulled down to near his eyes, a blue coat, sweatpants and running shoes. He also wore (perhaps Nelly inspired?) two large bandages stuck on his noggin: one across his left cheek and the other over his nose. He showed a teller a portable shaving kit, said it was a bomb, and then he filled his Ross Department Store bag with cash and slipped away. What a slick production it could have been, had the robber not immediately dumped his entire costume--including the bandages, stuffed inside the coat's left sleeve--in a nearby dumpster. Police nabbed some samples of the proverbial blueprints of life off of the discarded bandages and hat, and matched it to a sample they took from Howard after identifying him as a potential suspect. His sentencing is scheduled for June. No word yet on whether shaving kits will have to be sold in locked cases like cold medicine, now that the kits are an established terrorist threat.

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