Monday, April 28, 2014

Mr. Cope’s Cave: Light and Short

Posted By on Mon, Apr 28, 2014 at 10:19 AM

I’m throwing something light and short together here, and I’m trying to do it fast. Got a lot to do in the next few days, and little time for blogging.

Now obviously, “light and short” rules out anything that has to do with foreign affairs, global warming, Republican obstructionism, the existence (or not) of God, creeping fascism, voter suppression, the imminent Idaho primary elections, my health, evolution, public lands policy, education philosophy or astrophysics.

So what I think I’m going to settle on is Donald Trump. Most of you will immediately think Golly, Bill. Donald Trump may be light, everyone knows that. But you can hardly call him short.

My answer to that? There are several ways to be “short,” and the measurement from toes to comb-over is just one of them. One might be short in stature, yes, but he also can be short on cash, short on experience, short in empathy, short on good looks and, of course, short of brains.

Besides, it’s not so much Donald Trump I’m discussing today as a tweet he tweeted out Tuesday about the way President Obama walks.

Yes, you heard right. Donald Trump took the time from his busy schedule as a billionaire/television superstar/possible presidential candidate to tweet his opinion about how our president walks.

He said, “The way President Obama runs down the stairs of Air Force 1, hopping and bobbing all the way, is so inelegant and unpresidential. Do not fall!”

First of all, I want you to know that I read about this in an online news source. I don’t follow Donald Trump’s—or anyone else’s—tweets. If someone wants to tweet their life away, I don’t care. And in the case of Donald Trump, it is probably the ideal form of communication, as I see no evidence he has a brain that could put together a thought running any longer than a few dozen letters, anyway.

As to people who follow other people’s tweeting, I consider them in the same category as those strange, lonely individuals who spend their days tagging along behind celebrities and public figures, trying desperately to be in the right time and place to catch a whiff of a famous person’s fart when it happens. (I’m sure there is a name for such people, but since I neither tweet or read tweets, I am not “hip” to what that name might be. In fact, all I really know is that, if we can think it, rest assured someone is doing it.)

As to what Trump said in his tweet, including the between-the-lines implications that Donald Trump would know anything about either elegance or presidential bearing, I don’t know what to say. Besides, I believe the tweet speaks for itself, providing us with all we need to know about Donald Trump.

As to why I bothered to write a blog about it?... look, all I promised was something light and short. You got it, and I consider my job done.

Gotta run.

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