CURIOUS TIMES NOV. 5 EDITION 

THE CURE FOR SOBRIETY

Drunk frat boys are finally turning their thirst for beer to the greater good. A team of six students at Rice University in Houston are trying to create the world's first disease-fighting beer with a genetic modification that will imbue their brew with resveratrol, the chemical in red wine that fights cancer and heart disease. Their hope is that resveratrol will have a greater effect in beer because you would need to drink about half a bottle of wine per day to get the benefits that have been discovered in lab animals. The students are now in the process of developing a strain of yeast that will create beer with higher concentrations of the disease-fighting chemical than is possible in wine. (Fox News)

HOW TO SMASH YOUR COMPETITION

The 2008 World Rock Paper Scissors Championship celebrated its first-ever all-female final throw down as Monica Martinez of Toronto took home the $10,000 prize with a final match that had scissors slicing up paper. Martinez battled for more than five hours against competitors from Canada, the United States, Australia, New Zealand, Norway and Argentina in front of her hometown crowd of more than 700 players and spectators at Toronto's Steam Whistle Brewery. Hit up worldrps.com to join the festivities next year and get the nitty-gritty on Rock Paper Scissors strategy.

BUT WHERE WILL YOU FIND A JURY OF HIS PEERS?

The Nebraska senator who tried to file a lawsuit against God last year had his case thrown out because legal papers cannot be served since God has no fixed address. Last year Sen. Ernie Chambers tried to file a permanent injunction against God in order to stop Him from causing any more "fearsome floods ... horrendous hurricanes and terrifying tornadoes." Chambers is considering appealing the decision as he claims that an omniscient being wouldn't need legal papers to know that he is being sued. "Since God knows everything," said Chambers, "God has notice of this lawsuit." (BBC)

I DREAM OF TV

Strange new dream research has discovered that you only dream in color if you had a color TV set as a child. The study found that people who only had black-and-white television between the ages of 3 and 10 tend to dream in black-and-white images. (The Telegraph)

BETTY OR VERONICA?

A Japanese man who has fallen in love with a comic book character has created an online petition to persuade the government to let them get married. So far the king of the dorks has gathered 1,000 of the one million signatures he hopes for. "For a long time I have only been able to fall in love with two-dimensional people, and currently I have someone I really love," he explained, adding that, "I would even like to become a resident of the two-dimensional world." Good luck with that. (news.com.au)

BURGER HELL

A 21-year-old man in Pennsylvania is the first person to ever finish eating the Beer Barrel Belly Bruiser, a 20-pound hamburger served at a pub about 100 miles northeast of Pittsburgh. It took Brad Sciullo four hours and 39 minutes to choke down the monstrosity in order to win $400, three T-shirts, a certificate of achievement and a burger hangover. (AP)

ACID DROPPERS DROPPING

A team of researchers at the University of Michigan that has been tracking the illicit drug habits of America's high-school students since 1975 has discovered an enormous drop in the popularity of LSD among today's youth. As recently as 2001, 6.6 percent of high school seniors reported dropping acid. This figure fell to 3.5 percent in 2002 and plummeted to 1.9 percent in 2003. While the Federal Drug Enforcement Agency is taking credit for the demise of LSD, claiming that two arrests in November 2000 reduced the LSD supply by up to 95 percent, most analysts agree that the decline of LSD began the day that Jerry Garcia died in 1995. Apparently, the traveling road show of the Grateful Dead was the glue that kept the nation's network of LSD users and dealers connected. While the band Phish kept the party going for a few more years, after they stopped touring in 2000, figures for acid use began to plummet. (Slate)

INTERNET FACT OF THE WEEK

A "Roddenberry" is a unit of measurement equal to 4.157 trillion miles.

More bizarro news at CuriousTimes.com.

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