Minerva's Breakdown 

Advice for those on the verge


Dear Minerva,

I'm a 37-year-old femme bi-woman. Can you please ask the "hets" and "homos" to get off my back about "riding the fence?" I don't need to be more straight or more gay, and I am not intrinsically less trustworthy. Men have dated me out of intrigue but back out due to fears of infidelity. Past lesbian girlfriends have blamed my bisexuality for my personality or behaviors they didn't like, bringing my loyalty or ability to understand the "lesbian reality" into question. I am finally dating someone who accepts my attractions without negative assumptions. It would be really nice to be out at work and not be slut shamed, but I'm not holding my breath.

No Slut Shame in My Game

Dear No Shame,

Hey world, get off her back! Bisexuals exist! There. Hopefully all of creation will leave you alone about your sexuality. If not, put the naysayers in their place when it happens. Allow your integrity and personality to speak for themselves. Be brave enough to be yourself and care less about the haters. As for being "out at work," unless your job has something to do with sex, most people don't find their bedrooms a topic of office conversation. Be proud of who you are, but mind the fine line between empowerment and the murky waters of human resource nightmares.

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