Wine Not! 

Dear Minerva,

I recently had an acquaintance that came over to my house. He was celebrating a big change in his life, along with a few other mutual friends. He proceeded to get very drunk. Finally it was clear that he should not drive. He didn't have Uber or Lyft and he lived too far for me to pay for it or risk the cleanup fees should he vomit. I offered him the couch. About 45 minutes later, I heard him vomiting—all over my vintage sofa. How do I get red wine stains out of upholstery?

Sincerely,

Caber-NAY!

Dear NAY,

I'm so sorry that your guest...unswallowed...all over your sofa. To guests like that, I say, "Merlot You Go!" I certainly hope you found something that worked and aren't eagerly awaiting my reply. I have encountered this issue in the past (sometimes accidents happen). I have a quick solution. Using a clean cloth (preferably white to monitor your progress) dab the wine spill with a mixture of 1 tablespoon liquid dishwashing soap, such as Dawn, 1 tablespoon white vinegar and two cups of club soda. Adjust these measurements as needed depending on the size of the stain. This should help get the wine out of normal upholstery. If you have a different kind of sofa or speciality fabric, you might do some additional research. I have successfully used this method to get red wine out of vintage velour. If you have the funds, consult a professional. Cheers, sweetie!

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